Sun, Clouds and a Rainbow

On Monday evenings, I attend a Shiur about a forty- five minute drive from where I currently live, San Mateo, California. The Shiur is given in Pleasanton, across the bay. That being so, it's necessary to cross a bridge on the way.
Yesterday, as per usual, I began the drive at about 7.15. Contrary to the entire week preceding it, Monday had been a rainy day, with some short sunny intervals. However, when I left, it was dry, something that made me particularly glad as I don't like driving in the rain very much.
As I neared the end of the twelve mile long bridge, I noticed that the area I was driving towards was heavy with gloom. Behind me, the sun was valiantly battling some clouds but ahead was grey. I stepped on the gas and nervously hoped I'd make it before the rain would begin.
It was just then that the gas symbol lit up mischievously on my dashboard. I groaned inwardly. Checking the GPS (that wonderful invention which I deviate between blessing and cursing depending on the situation) I saw I still had a further twenty minutes to go. That wouldn't do at all!
So I reluctantly headed off the next exit to find a gas station. The Shiur began at seven thirty. Officially.I typically would turn up around eight- along with the rest of the participants. Right now though, this delay would throw me off a further ten minutes. But it was either that or break down on the highway, something I haven't yet experienced and have no strong desire to.
Filling up on gas took longer than normal, due to some malfunction of my debit card which forced me to pay inside at the cashier. But I accepted it as 'meant to be' and hurriedly filled my tank.
Back on the road again. It was seven forty now and the new destination time read 8.11. I knew that if I drove on seventy five, the time tended to drop by a couple of minutes. It's a game I always play- how many minutes can you save on the GPS?
Even as I drove back onto the highway, the sky darkened right above me and a sinister aura swept over the road. By the time I was merging, fat drops of rain began pelting my windshield, leaving smudged blotches in their wake. I turned on the windscreen wipers to medium strength. Pretty soon I raised the frequency. I focused on the road ahead of me and gripped the steering wheel tightly. Fortunately, it looked like the kind of rain that would shoot forth in full gear and then dissipate almost immediately after. But at that moment it was pretty much torrential and for some reason, it was making me pretty nervous to the point that I began spouting tehillim at regular intervals.
There weren't too many cars on the road, which was a good thing, as I could barely see five inches in front of me. My speed dropped to about forty miles an hour. I craned my neck forward until my head was practically touching the windshield wipers. I concentrated on just that- concentrating! The rain still hadn't slowed down and the roads looked slippery.
After about barely two minutes, though it seemed much longer, I saw that the rain had slackened somewhat. The clouds in front of me were still murky and broody looking. I allowed my gaze to wander momentarily to the rearview mirror- and I let out a gasp!
The sky behind me was ablaze with an almost surreal light. A luminous golden yellow edged the horizon, against which hills and houses stood black. The air was misty, sometimes vague, lending a supernatural power to the scene. There was no sun- it was as if it had let go of all its' effects and treated the skies to a taste of its' glory.
All this my eyes took in during that split second that they left the road in front of me. For I was still on the highway driving in the rain- a rain that contrasted so deeply to the view behind me that I wandered if I had imagined it. But the telltale drops on my windscreen gave evidence to the downpour. And unlike the yellow hues I was driving away from, the picture in front of me hadn't changed and was as stormy as ever.
For the next few minutes, I deviated my gaze between the rearview mirror and the car in front of me. I tried drinking in as much of the magnificent scene as I could in those fleeting glances. And as twilight began to take over, a thought crossed my mind. There must be a beautiful rainbow up there somewhere! So I looked out the window beside me and scanned the sky. Nope- no rainbow in sight. It must be on the other side, I mused. I checked the opposite window quickly. Uh uh. A rainbow stark and bright should have been stretching across these eerie skies- hadn't I learned since kindergarden that Hashem places a rainbow in the sky after a rainfall as proof He will never again flood the whole world? At some point, the notion that rain and sun in succession is a sure lure for a rainbow to appear, had permeated society. Yet to the right and left of me, though all signs showed, no multicolored arc lit up the gloom.
With another fifteen minutes to go until I reached my destination, I had plenty time to ponder this strange phenomenon. Behind me was sun and in front of me rain. But from where I was sitting, no rainbow showed. I came up with the obvious solution: though I couldn't see it within the confines of the space I was in, the rainbow was there, somewhere, giving life to its surroundings, brightening a gloomy day. Maybe I would see it later on, after a turn in the highway. Maybe I had missed it. Maybe I wouldn't see it at all. But somewhere, there was a gorgeous rainbow blending the light and darkness.

Cruising on through the now rain-free roads, I let my thoughts run free. Sometimes in life, I mused, we have beautiful sunny spells. Life is good. Fortune smiles down on us; each day is a joy of warmth and laughter- an almost surreal comforting era. But all that can change in a minute. Heavy clouds can gather, ominous and forbidding. We get rained on with harsh, heavy troubles. It takes all our effort to concentrate on getting through each day, with barely enough time to focus on anything else. When we look back at the days of joy, we can hardly believe they were experienced by us! How could matters change so drastically? Where is the fairness of it all when all that lies ahead is darkness?
And we search for that rainbow. There must be some good in this, we tell ourselves. A splash of color to brighten the depressing gloom. Fortunately, sometimes, we see the rainbow, an arch of goodness that softens the blow and helps us understand and accept. But there are also times we search fruitlessly and that rainbow is nowhere to be found. The light has gone and darkness has descended but there is nothing to dispel our pain. We look out all the windows, attempting many angles, willing ourselves to trust that even within this, lies beauty.

'Destination ahead in point five miles.' My friend the GPS jolted me out of my reverie. I had almost arrived at my goal. The road had not always been easy. But with trust and faith, and a little bit of tehillim, I had arrived.
And so will we all.